Thursday, January 15, 2004
You are under considerable stress and you are almost about to 'blow your top' but you are fortunate enough to be able to exert control. Control is the name of the game and it is so good to realize that whatever the situation may be at this time - it will pass. You need to get away from everything for a while and if you do, you will find that, strangely enough, it will seem that most of your problems and situations will seem to wash away, just as the sea may wash away 'footprints' in the sand.
You are looking for excitement and stimulation and you are ready to try anything - but be careful not to take too many risks.
You are very demanding - and insisting on total involvement but you do not reciprocate with the same depth of feeling. However, it could well be that maybe an unprecedented surprise is awaiting you in the near future. For just as one whilst paddling in the sea, could flounder into a whirlpool, so you may be drawn into a loving situation that has high emotional demands - and you could well respond with a depth of emotion that you never even dreamed that you possessed.
Setback after setback has resulted in considerable stress and now you have got to the stage where you are continuously on your guard, not only to protect yourself from others but to protect yourself from yourself. It would seem that many of your unfulfilled hopes and dreams have led to uncertainty and suspicion. You no longer wish to answer to others and you are insisting on freedom of thought. You feel that you are fully self-sufficient and can control your own destiny. You are seeking ways to protect yourself from further loss of prestige and against further setbacks. You have become very dependent and you doubt that matters could possibly get any better in the immediate future and this negative attitude is leading you to exaggerate your claims and to refuse reasonable compromise.
You need to be needed and would like a situation where you will no longer be subjected to pressures and demands from those about you. There is no harm in 'dreaming' but it is you - and only you - that can be able to realize those dreams and to turn them into reality.
wah.. haven't been online for so long.. busy working n going out n all tat.. come home dun haf time or the strength to switch on the comp le.. today's my offday.. then i'll b busy till monday.. hopefully i can get enof rest.. alreadi haf enof problems as it is... heard they gonna cut on manpower cos one of the boss tinks tat there's too many pple working each day.. so if they cut the schedule i'll most prolly b screwed.. tis mths pay they're rushing out.. but i'm getting lyk onli 500 plus.. freaking pathetic..after repaying my debts i'll b left wif peanuts to survive the nxt mth.. the transport fee is realli killing me man.. haha, lyk dunno each wk can spend freaking lots on transport alone.. n i still need to buy CNY clothes too.. sux.. i havent been home half the time now.. always spend lyk 16-17 hrs outside when i'm working.. then come home just bathe n slp.. tis job realli both mentally n physically taxing.. hafta psyche myself to wake up on time every morning when i dun haf enof slp.. then hafta survive the day at work.. it'll b ok if i'm doing brochures.. pretty slack job.. but if i'm usher in the hall then realli will stand till legs wan break.. everyday reach home dunno how late alreadi... dun get enof slp then the nxt day gotta go work again.. haha, torture i tell ya...
